Hope Tree

Well the pace of my life has certainly stepped up several gears in the last couple of weeks.

The Childrens Hope Tree Project has launched!!!! I have gathered a panel of great parents who have volunteered to help with this massive undertaking. So far we have successfully completed two days of textile craft work in the school. We have at least another 7 school days scheduled.

Each child represents a stitch in the fabric of society. As each stitch plays an important part in the creation of a fabric or tapestry, so too does each child play a vital role in creating a beautiful community.

The underlying theme of the project is stitch, weave, textile. Every child participates by creating a christmas decoration using an element of textile. For example, Funky Yarn Folk, Pompoms, String Balls, etc. Each christmas decoration is woven together in the form of a garland, reflecting the unity of each class. Each garland embraces the christmas tree, reflecting the gathering of a community.

Historically the evergreen tree was celebrated because it represented the 'hope' of the return of Spring.

This project represents community embracing hope!!!!

I am so excited!!!!

Getting Kicked when your Down.

My beautiful 8 yr old daughter was assaulted by 4 boys her own age whilst on a play date at her friend's house last week. It appears her friend's brother has been bullying my daughter for some time now..... insidious and subtle, and I was not aware. And it culminated in an assault upon her.

'Let's get her' were the words spoken... she was taken down, jumped on, kicked, hit with a sweeping brush.... and a rock was raised... thank God something stopped that rock from being thrown.

She returned to me damaged.... the physical injuries were slight, nothing beyond bruising..... but the emotional hurt was and still is visible in her eyes... and it pains me greatly that I was not there to save her.

Four boys and not one of them thought 'no... this is wrong... stop!'

I have not the words to express my pain, confusion, fear, anger...

Dangling on a Thread

Whoever came up with the line .... 'it never rains, but it pours!' Man is that my life recently!

I've already mentioned the fact that my mom is diagnosed clinically depressed.... if truth be told... has been all her life, but chronically so for the last 7/8 yrs. She is spiralling downward once again into a deep black hole, and I am finding it so hard to reach in and try grab her hand to pull her out.

However, she is only the rain.

The last 10 days has seen the arrival of another crisis on my doormat, a culmination of 13 months of shear dysfunction between my three brothers. Each one has come to me with a major personal crisis / life upheaval experience which has made me realise I know absolutely nothing about them other than surface detail. Once upon a time, I saw my brothers as a tight brotherly unit... a rock ... with me on the outside being the only sister and the eldest. Years of silence, secrets, non-communication.... rooted in my mother, has insidiously pervaded through my family bringing fissures in that rock... which have expanded into gaping cracks. And in 13 months, a nerve has been exposed!

The matters they have revealed to me have left my heart shattered.... and suffice to say I cannot at this point divulge anything more. They are three broken men. Terrifyingly, I now find myself in the position where it is only me who can now try to pick up the shards and help fix things for them, as they do not, nor cannot, summon the strength to do so for themselves. But I really have no notion of where to start!

Last week... en route to the supermarket, I found myself driving on the verge of complete breakdown... this volcano of grief was just boiling away and surging to explode out of me. I really fought hard to contain it. My head and heart was screaming... 'what do I do? what do I do?'

On another night, I found myself in bed unable to sleep... my chest was heaving with this ugly pain trying to free itself. I found myself holding my chest tightly trying to smother the pain so as not to wake my husband.

Realising that this is unhealthy and that I really, really need to keep it together, I successfully made that tentative phone call to my mother's therapist.... I figure it may as well start there. I have a week and a half before I travel West to 'talk' to him. I feel blind. Please god.... he will give me some direction and tell me how I can fix my family...

And yet, despite all this.... I have gone and thrown myself into all sorts of projects.... Parent's Association committee, School Christmas Art Project, local ICA volunteer work, knitting circle........ is this an unconscious reaction to distract myself from my grief or am I running to stand still?

I would just love the peace of a soft Irish mist on my face. If only.

Ravelry..... and My Ache-y, Break-y Arms !!

Hey.... my Ravelry invite came thru!!! Yippee! I felt really chuffed when the invite arrived in my mailbox. Its a great feeling to BELONG!

I worked out fairly intensely this week.

On Monday, Clare got tough with her Lower Body workout. Weight bearing moves followed by plyometric moves and back again. I thought my legs would collapse.

Tuesday, I stepped it out with Daniela... the coordination is returning.

Wednesday, Greg took us for our Upper Body workout, and my poor arms, chest & shoulders are still aching. My arms quiver & shake when I attempt to straighten them. It was a weight bearing, plyometric & boxing combo! Bobby took us Spinning directly afterwards which was an uphill climb on the heaviest gear.

Thursday came as a breath of fresh air despite the fact that I used the day to catch up on the housework..... a workout in itself.

And after all my good work.... what did I do? We had guests home from New Zealand staying with us for the night.... so we headed out for a Chinese meal.... apparently Chinese restaurants are very few and far between in Christchurch. That wasn't too bad I suppose as I did not bother with dessert. However, when we got home and got the young 'uns to bed.... us adults indulged with Champagne, Red wine and some even went as far as Cognac..... not good!! In fact... the un-Ravelry of me! I felt hideous today.... bad hair, delicate tummy, saggy eyed, and exhausted. Never again!

Beating the blahs.............

I am three weeks back into my training and I am still feeling blah!!!! Must be my age creeping up on me! Its just that I have not hit that exercise high yet! I really thought by now that I would be back into tip top sparkly form and bouncing with energy. I will give it another week........

On the other hand, my mind is exploding with lots of knitting ideas!!!
Plans are afoot for a commuKNITTY knitting project just in time for Christmas. I should have more to report on this next week.
And after flashing my stash..... I have renewed inspiration for my stash. My yarn spoke to me..... REALLY!

And.... before it completely slipped my mind... today I started my Noro Felted Mitred Square Bag for the Dublin Knit Collective's Autumn Show 'n Tell. I just hope I have it finished on time. I will get a few photos uploaded later on.

I was in my local book shop yesterday checking out the craft section.... and found Debbie Bliss' new book 'Essential Baby'..... I bought it as my brother has a beautiful new baby boy!!!! Did I mention I'm an auntie for the first time, and.... I'm his Godmother!!!! Did I mention it??

Flashing...... the Stash!

Wow.... this was fun.... I'm not a photographer but it was fun to try to portray the beauty and character of my stash in photographs! I think I did OK!

Sshhhh!


















Hmmm.... whats in here....

Touch of Autumn

Wow.. Have I had a busy week since I last chatted with y'all!
First of all, on the weekend, I took a trip cross country to visit my folks. Let me tell you, my mom is a chronic depressive! Yikes.... I need not tell you, the weekend was physically and emotionally gruelling! God love my poor dad, who takes such good care of her. He truly has the patience of a saint and loves her solidly. If only she could see it and appreciate it.
It was such a lovely relief to escape that negative place and return back home, and to allow myself fall back into my exercise and knitting. It is truly my therapy!
So on Monday morning, I launched myself back into the gym, with an intense Upper Body workout. Tuesday, I found myself stumbling through a Step Class. Wow... how uncoordinated was I?? And today.... a tough Lower Body workout followed by Spinning. I am looking forward to my rest day tomorrow.
After nearly two weeks back to training, I am still suffering the DOMS. I am expecting that to change by the end of next week, .... I am expecting a little more muscle definition and a lot less muscle stiffness. It would be a treat to see some pounds melting away too.... (I would love to lose about 7lbs before Christmas). However, that is not a priority... I CAN live with 7lbs. I am quite comfortable in my 'softer' body.

There is definitely a noticeable touch of autumn in the air. Just that hint of a chill, enough to draw the knitting out. I am nearly finished my Affric wrap (Rowan magazine 42). I substituted Wool Cotton with a beautiful claret red Felted Tweed. I expect to finish it tonight, and when I do, I will get a photo uploaded. Beyond that, I've purchased a few new knitting books /magazines in the last few days and can't wait to get started on a few new projects.... Interweave Felt, Knitscene, the pattern for Fiber Trends Leaf Lace Shawl, the pattern for Tink-kniT Felted Purls, the new Rowan Kidsilk Aura design collection, and Mags Kandis new book Folkstyle!!! From that collection, I have no shortage of possible new projects... the most difficult decision is which do I start first!! My Purple Felted Tweed is shouting at me to get on the needles. It wants to wrap itself around my shoulders! Just what I need for that chilly touch of autumn!

Knitty-Oh!

Legs like Jelly!

Apparently muscle has a 6 week memory.... and after a summer of laziness.... my muscles have certainly forgotten how to work painlessly.
I hit the gym bright and early on Monday morning and jumped with glee into a class focussed on the Upper Body....
On Wednesday morning... thinking I was clever, I decided to tackle a class focussed on the Lower Body..... AND followed it up with a Spinning class!
My over-eagerness has left me pretty sore and stiff today!! Put it this way... I am finding it difficult to get up from the sofa, get out of the car, and to even get dressed. Of course, I should have expected it, after all I've been at this workout game since I was 13.
Then of course this morning... I dropped into the gym to sample a new class called 'Bouldering'... I was kinda doubting I'd be able for it but I was keen to give it a go. I'm a sucker for pushing myself beyond my limits.
and Ohmigod........ I found myself in a class with 2 gorgeous lithe Aussie blokes who were experienced rock climbers! I could feel their smirks as I attempted to shift my butt across the rock wall.... They made it look all so easy as they scampered across it with their long arms & legs & cute butts!!
My hands are aching... not a good thing for a knitter. I may have to rethink the whole 'Bouldering' thing! Really... at 40 yrs of age do I really need it?

So much to do.... why can't I wave a wand!

Wouldn't it be lovely to just click your fingers, and all those miserable 'icky' tasks that you've put on the long finger all summer long ...... just magically ... get done!!
I have a long list of just boring household tasks that need to get done before the depths of winter set in .... and in Ireland, those depths could start next week, judging by the crap summer we've had so far!
So I guess, seeing as I'm 'Getting Started'.... I may as well set myself a few reasonable goals.

1) I've booked myself a Pilates course to kick start my Fall fitness!

2) I found 4 balls of a delicious purple Rowan Felted Tweed while visiting Galway recently, and I want to knit a yummy shawl just for ME!!! (All suggestions welcome!!)

and finally I guess.... I hope....

3) The 'icky' stuff will be shifted by the end of September.

Is that too much to ask?

Getting Started

I've successfully created my very first blog account, Jellyknits!!



Tomorrow is September 1st, a new month, a new season, the girls are back to school, I can get back to knitting, I can get back to the gym!!



I love fresh starts!!